I am (not) a failure: Lessons learned from six failed startup attempts

Wealth, Risk, and Luck

• Many argue startup “success vs failure” is heavily constrained by whether you can afford to fail repeatedly; wealth buys more attempts.
• Counterpoints: hardship can forge relentless founders; immigrants and “grindset” are cited, but others call this survivorship bias.
• Several note that luck, timing, and existing comfort matter at least as much as effort or talent.

What Counts as Success or Failure

• Strong theme: success is subjective – money, family, health, autonomy, and integrity all appear as competing metrics.
• Some see the author as a failure because the explicit goal (“successful founder”) wasn’t met; others say the person can still be a success even if ventures failed.
• Debate over whether reframing painful outcomes as “success” is healthy growth or emotional “coping.”

Startups vs Conventional Careers

• Multiple commenters claim a long, well-paid career (Big Tech, banks, insurance, CRUD work) is often financially superior and less risky than startups.
• Others emphasize the journey, learning, and autonomy as non-monetary reasons to found companies.
• Some report their main lesson: don’t start a startup; others insist not trying would be worse than failing and wondering “what if.”

Execution, Ideas, and Skills

• Repeated point: ideas were often good and later validated by other companies (ridesharing, charter platforms, Airtable-like tools), but execution, timing, and team were lacking.
• Startups are framed as a distinct skillset: sales, hiring, product–market fit, capital, and regulation — not just engineering or research.
• Several note that technical or academic excellence (e.g., PhDs) does not prepare you for business-building.

Psychology of Founding and Failure

• Founders describe burnout, impostor feelings, and loneliness, especially without co-founders or sales partners.
• Others report redefining success around personal growth and resilience: being able to fail repeatedly yet remain broadly happy.
• There’s disagreement on perseverance: some say “quit when the going gets tough,” others see persistence as essential, within reason.

Structural Barriers and Risk Pooling

• Access to networks, capital, and trustworthy co-founders is seen as a major bottleneck; many recount exploitative equity offers and flaky “idea guys.”
• Proposals surface for spreading risk across founder pools or accelerator batches so one big win partially compensates others’ failures; similar schemes are mentioned as already tried, with unclear impact.

Banking and Fraud Tangent

• A side discussion examines credit card fraud and banking: banks treat fraud as a small cost of doing business and pass costs to consumers.
• Some argue this makes large-scale technical fixes low-priority for banks despite potential societal gains.