Half the men in Seattle are never-married singles, census data shows

Terminology and what “single” means

• Multiple commenters note “single” in census data means “not legally married,” not “not in a relationship.”
• This conflation is seen as misleading: long‑term unmarried partners, poly relationships, and cohabiting couples all show up as “single.”
• Some argue the article implies a logical fallacy: declining marriage doesn’t necessarily mean more people are romantically unattached.
• Others point out that census categories are blunt instruments, and that states like Washington also have “committed intimate relationship” or common‑law–like doctrines that create marriage‑like obligations without paperwork.

Dating, porn, and relationship preferences

• Anecdotes range from “it’s easy to meet people with apps and events” to “dating is more broken than ever.”
• Several comments blame or question porn as a factor: for some, it reduces motivation to seek partners; others see it as a harmless or even preferable substitute if someone only wants sex, not a relationship.
• There’s repeated recognition that many people either don’t want relationships or struggle to form healthy ones; some consciously construct lives around friends rather than partners.
• References to “relationship‑free” or MGTOW‑style mindsets frame opting out as both choice and coping mechanism.

Housing, city structure, and Seattle specifics

• Common pattern: people marry/have kids, then leave high‑cost cores like Seattle for cheaper suburbs with more space and better schools.
• That skews city demographics toward younger, childless, and often single residents, so high “never‑married” rates may mostly reflect who can afford to stay.
• Seattle’s geography, sprawl, weak transit, and lack of low‑cost “third places” are seen as barriers to forming community or meeting partners.
• High daycare costs and safety concerns are cited as making family life in the city difficult.

Legal, financial, and policy incentives

• Some avoid marriage due to tax penalties, benefit loss, or community‑property rules that can entangle or endanger businesses and assets.
• Others emphasize marriage’s protections, especially for lower‑earning or caregiving partners, inheritance, and medical decision‑making.
• There’s debate over whether US law over‑rewards marriage or, via means‑tested benefits, actually punishes low‑income couples who wed.

Changing norms and demographic worries

• Many see declining marriage as part of broader trends: women’s increased independence, weaker social pressure to marry, and the feasibility of living alone.
• Several link fewer couples to falling fertility and speculate about long‑term civilizational impacts, sometimes veering into controversial proposals (sex selection, all‑female societies), which others criticize as eugenic or unnecessary.
• Some argue we should stop economically privileging marriage and accept diverse family structures; others worry no advanced society has endured without a strong marriage institution.

Loneliness and mental health

• The thread includes personal stories of deep loneliness, including a brother in Seattle who died by suicide, used to illustrate how easy it is to be isolated despite living in a city.
• Commenters connect this to an “epidemic of loneliness,” personality issues, social distrust between sexes, and difficulty forming attachments, especially among younger men.