I beg you to follow Crocker's Rules, even if you will be rude to me

Original Article ↗ Hacker News Discussion ↗

Scope and Meaning of Crocker’s Rules

  • Several commenters argue Crocker’s Rules are self-imposed: they apply only to how others speak to the invoker, not a license to tell others how they must communicate.
  • Some say the blog post blurs this, reading as prescriptive or contemptuous toward people who value politeness or cushioning.
  • Others recall the rules’ original context as enabling frank discussion of “taboo” topics, not micro-optimizing message length.

Directness vs. Politeness

  • Supporters of directness emphasize:
    • Respect for time and focus, especially in technical contexts.
    • Reduced fear of “shooting the messenger,” making it easier to surface problems.
    • Personal preference for blunt feedback and fast problem resolution.
  • Critics counter that:
    • Directness is often used as cover for rudeness or personal attacks.
    • Many people genuinely experience blunt messages as hostile, regardless of intent.
    • The author’s tone itself feels judgmental and brittle, undermining their point.

Context, Relationships, and Culture

  • Many insist direct, terse style works best when there is already trust, cohesion, and emotional safety.
  • Others note cultural variation: some European environments are naturally more blunt, while US workplaces often expect more social lubrication.
  • Several say people who loudly claim to want extreme directness often react poorly when on the receiving end.

Technical Communication and Incident Reports

  • There is disagreement about what counts as “noise”:
    • Some see stress, unclear docs, or bad handoffs as irrelevant detail.
    • Others argue those factors are crucial for postmortems, systemic fixes, and avoiding blame.
  • Commenters stress the importance of expressing uncertainty (“seems to,” “looks like”) and context rather than making absolute declarations.

Hybrid and Audience‑Sensitive Approaches

  • Many propose a middle ground:
    • Be concise, clear, and honest.
    • Add minimal but genuine human context and hedging where appropriate.
    • Tailor style to the recipient; a skilled communicator adjusts rather than enforces a single mode.
  • Several conclude that insisting others drop cushioning purely for one person’s preference is itself selfish or socially naive.